In my pre-kid life, I never imagined I would be a stay at home mom (FACT: I didn’t want any kids of my own) but when I became a working mom of two boys under two, I had a huge change of heart. Being a stay at home mom is one of the hardest responsibilities I’ve ever had but it has been one of the most rewarding choices I’ve made. When I first took on this journey, I only thought about how great it would be! Think about it… I didn’t have to work, I didn’t have to make time to spend with my children, and I didn’t have to rush life anymore! What I failed to realize was how tiring and how challenging it would be to be on my best behavior on the days I wanted to call out.
Before you get upset for what I am going to write below, you should know five years ago I was a pregnant, working at home mom and for the past year and a half I’ve been a stay at home, homeschooling mom so I definitely understand where the desire to whine and complain comes from. Thanks to both experiences I learned that being a stay at home mom is not a “job” no matter how difficult it is or how hard we work on our children. Getting to do nothing but raise the humans you brought into this world in my book, is a privilege.
Society is hard on stay at home mom’s, we get a lot of grief from academics, professionals, and in my case even nosey friends and family members. We are very often belittled by our society for not contributing anything “valuable” and it creates a need to defend ourselves against a culture that wants to make us feel inferior or useless because of the way we are spending our time. When we refer to our choice of being a stay at home mom as a job we’re thinking about all the daily chores that need to be done. Unfortunately, kids or no kids we all have to clean, cook, do laundry, and run errands. Raising your kids isn’t a chore and being a stay at home mom in my personal opinion is not a “job.”
When I chose to be a stay at home mom I knew my life was going to slow down and my career would come second and I was and still am okay with that, in the blink of an eye I’ll have my life back, my kids will be grown, and I won’t feel regretful. Being a mom is not easy but our “job” as moms is to raise headstrong, independent, and successful children. Being a part of my boys EVERYDAY life is something I am extremely thankful for, I’m also thankful to have a partner who has always wanted me to be a stay at home mom and helps make that possible. When someone tells you “being a stay at home mom is not a job!” well they’re right, staying at home to raise your kids is not a job, it’s a privilege.
Organize yourself accordingly, put the chores to the side and focus on your child. Enjoy your child, love your child, laugh and play with your child, after all that is what you stay at home for. Everyday I remind myself “I didn’t choose to stay at home to cook, clean, and do laundry. I chose to be a stay at home mom, to love, guide, influence, motivate, teach, and protect my boys. We can eat left overs, do laundry tomorrow, and clean over the weekend, as long as they feel safe, loved, understood and happy, nothing else matters.”
xo, Preschool With Mama